Saturday, October 22, 2005


2L Guy: Catholic School Girls have a reputation for taking it in the pooper.

2L Girl: Really? I didn't know that.

2L Guy: Yeah, they can't "have sex" so they do it in the dumper to stay virgins. It's like textualism gone horribly awry.

Happy Halloweenie

Queer 1: Law students are just too OCD to want to bob for apples, so I decided against doing that at the party.
Queer 2: Gay men lick butts all the time. You think they're worried about bobbing for apples?

Friday, October 21, 2005

you've always got a friend in WestLaw

Lonely 2L: Sometimes I use the "Live Help" feature on WestLaw when I'm doing research late at night as a way of saying "Is there anybody out there? I haven't left my house for days and you don't care if I smell!"

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Why Will moved to Bel-Air

Torts Professor: It was foreseeable that criminals would use that parking garage to commit crimes. Was it foreseeable that a cop could also be a criminal? Hey look, I'm from Philadelphia. The notion that a police officer might also be a criminal, coming from Philadelphia, I assure you is foreseeable.

Prof on fire

Property Prof: I was watching C-SPAN, which is what law professors do for fun...C-SPAN is reality tv for law professors, as opposed to 'Pimp My Ride'.

And he's a fan!

Property Professor: There are those who say Estates and Future Interests are a form of hazing. But it doesn't involve dropping you off in the middle of nowhere with 20 cents in your pocket, so you might say it's more enjoyable than hazing.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

We're just providing shade...

Prof: The case has been filed, you can't just 'give up'.
Student: Sure we can. We can get rid of music production. We can merge. Or we can drop the suit and declare bankruptcy. We have three ways of giving up. We're like France!

Tasteless Fun

2L Guy: Yeah it'll get really cold here this winter. You'll be shaking like Michael J. Fox with a hangover.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

X-ibit would be proud

CORE Prof: "What do we call those people that rip the guts out of old cars when they are being restored?"
2L: "Pimp my ride!"

Borrowed from sgcgabe (thanks!)

Monday, October 17, 2005

Seriously, did you wash your hands?

1L Chick: But, hon, it still hurts!
1L Guy: Hurting is ok. But if it starts burning by Monday, we'll go to the doctor.

absolute power...

Disaffected 2L: I'd make a much better war lord than a law student.

Drinking games!

1L dude to 1L chick: I guarantee you, we'll get home after the sun rises. I can drunk dial you at 9:00 am.

reverse psychology

1L dude: "I can't do the reading cause then she'll ask me questions!"

Spring break musings, part III

1L chick: You could go to Florida. There's no income tax there. Not like you'd be earning income, but anyway...

Spring break musings, part II

1L dude: I like oceans. Except when I lived near the beach for four years. Then I never went.

Spring break musings, part I

1L dude: Can we go somewhere tropical?
1L dude with drool: Yeah, somewhere with bikinis.
1L chick: and coconuts!
1L with drool: Oooh, coconut bikinis.