Saturday, December 01, 2007
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Prof: We got him spanked by daddy....Posner spanked him.
Monday, November 05, 2007
Female #1: Do you work here?
Female #2: We hate you.
Female #1: Kidding!
Employee: How can I help you?
Female #1: We are looking to buy beer, but we don't know what to get
Female #2: We don't want Frat Party beer
Female #1: And we don't want something that screams 'Snob!'
Employee: You want Law Student Beer.
Female #1 and #2: YES!
Sunday, November 04, 2007
1L#1: It's like they're taking their marketing cues from street hustlers.
1L#2: Yeah, "Psssst--hey, kid, wanna buy a statute?"
1L#1: "C'mon, first ten hits are free."
Overheard by JB3
Overheard by KG
Torts Prof: Defendants may, in this case, possibly be held liable for a tort if "one holds her down while the other one fingers her."
Overheard by DF
Overheard by JV
Monday, October 29, 2007
Overheard by LegalBuffy
Sunday, October 21, 2007
1L #2: "And how did you answer?"
1L #1: "I told her I didn't know, after several minutes of over-thinking the problem. I think, at that moment, I would have rather explained how babies were made or why her mommy and her daddy can't live together."
Overheard by SR
1L: I would never do that.
Contracts Prof: But what if they promised to double your salary?
1L: I would totally do that.
Overheard by SR
Eccentric Torts professor: "Because it's so utterly dull to go through the game of romance, am I right guys? All men know that candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."
Overheard by VB.
3L: --Dumbfounded Silence--
Overheard by KDB
3L #1 in a stall: I've been peeing a lot lately. I guess it's all the fluids.
overheard by: bitch you're peeing because it's a liquid
However, I've come to the conclusion that Overheard is going to stay open even though most of my original posters are no longer in school to lurk in corners overhearing your greatness. I've got quite a few contributions from readers to start with this week. The people who have posting privileges can continue to post, but otherwise, I am going to be posting the contributions every SUNDAY EVENING. Please use email@example.com to submit your contributions.
If you want to be a permanent poster, write me a paragraph about why you think you're funny.
LiserDoesLaw (a.k.a. Overheard In Law School's admin)
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Monday, September 03, 2007
Friday, August 31, 2007
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Previously silent male 1L: I think it is ridiculous that men should be held responsible for the irrational actions of any crazy woman they piss off.
Same Male 1L: The pimp wasn’t “beating” his ho; he was merely communicating his discontentment with the relationship. Perhaps a better way would have been for him to simply tell her that she had become a fat old skank and he wasn’t interested anymore.
At the beginning of class the following Monday:
Prof: Where’s Male 1L? Did the girls in class get to him over the weekend?
Overheard by SS
Contracts prof: The law school is fertile ground for hook-ups y'all... Once you graduate you won't have time to find someone... so you only have 2 1/2 years left!
Overheard by SL
2L girl: Crap. My boss at [Big Firm] just sent me an email. He's starting a summer softball league. I'm terrible at softball.
2L guy: So? Just don't play.
2L girl: Yeah...you don't understand how the big firms work. I'm going to the batting cages.
Overheard by MM
1L guy #1 shakes fist angrily.
1L guy #2: reading a Scalia opinion?
1L guy #1: No, Brennan.
1L guy #2: The problem is, Brennan's never met a rule he liked. No rules for him.
1L guy #1: Seriously. If Brennan was a chick, he'd put out on the first date.
Overheard by RB
Evidence Prof: So, would it be an excited utterance, for example, if you were on a bus and I just walked by and... just.... pinched your little buttocks?! What if I were an attractive woman? You'd probably like it!
Overheard by HH
Con Law prof: One of my early jobs was working for some magazines and I had to read Playgirl every month... One of the things I had to determine whether it was obscene was something called the "angle of the dangle."
Overheard by KE
Monday, May 07, 2007
2L #1: Well, when my sister and I were arrested, our story was featured in Playboy. Does that mean that I shouldn't be allowed to take the bar?
2L #1: I mean, we weren't pictured or anything…
2L #2, jumping in: Well, some people might be more likely to hire her because she was in Playboy. I know I would.
Overheard by The LawBitches
Overheard by jgg
Prof: If I wanted to see white powder this time of year, I'd buy some fucking cocaine! Not that I've ever bought drugs. But if I did, the statute of limitations has long passed. Ok, let's talk about bribery!
Overheard by legal lush
Prof: Are you still in this class? I haven’t seen you in months.
1L: I still come to class.
Prof: Apparently not when there is a brief due.Overheard by LegalBuffy
Prof: I tried to get him to listen to NWA but all he wanted to listen to was Rush Limbaugh. And he wouldn't include the word 'blunt' in his opinion either.
Overheard by KE
Prof: Sir, what is the "ultimate sex act"?
Student: Well, that's a personal call, and I really don't care what these people say.
Overheard by desertvirga
Friday, May 04, 2007
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Male 2L: This has to be exactly what it's like.
Female 2L: Daddy, I'm hungry.
Male 2L: You just ate. Wait for your food to settle.
Female 2L: Dude, it's settled. I can already feel a turtle head poking out.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Justice Souter: "So your position is that we ignore context because the voters aren't smart enough to have a context?"(Responding to attorney for the petitioner's argument that polls show most Americans don't know who the vice president is.)
Kennedy makes a plea for considering context too, but it appears to be chiefly an effort to get the words "biker bar" into the transcript.
Via Dahlia Lithwick
Monday, April 23, 2007
Friday, April 20, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
2L (under breath): It's not like telling her to stop has ever worked before.
3L #2: It's like watching Romeo and Juliet. Every time you see the end, you're hoping it'll be different. But it never is.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
3L #2: This is the ghetto, there is no curtilage, thus no reasonable expectation of privacy. Didn't you get the memo from Scalia?
3L girl #1: What are you, a pimp or something?
2L guy: Are you looking for a pimp? Are you a prostitute?
3L girl #2: You don't want to send her out to be your prostitute. You'd wind up with nothing but a string of dead johns.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Thursday, April 12, 2007
3L #1: So I asked her if her husband still showed her affection. And she said yes, he brings me flowers.
3L #2: Sadly, that's not really the relevant question.
3L #3: Seriously. The real question is "Are you getting head?"
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Prof: Once you become the big pimp, you can cast off the playas.
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Monday, April 09, 2007
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Student: The final prong of Miller asks whether the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, or scientific value.
Student: So is that why so many pornos have a plumber or a cable guy come in? So they can argue that there is an educational value? They teach valuable trade skills and THEN have sex!
Overheard by LH
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Student #1: I'd probably tell them to go down and talk to the police if he didn't do it and he'll be exonerated.
Crim Pro Prof: Uhhhhhhhhh....what if it was your client?
Student #1: Well that's a different story.
Crim Pro Prof: I think i'd rather be your client than your kid.
a couple minutes later, same conversation.
Crim Pro Prof: What about you, what would you do?
Student #2: I'd call an attorney.
Crim Pro Prof: You ARE an attorney!
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
for my Philosophy of Criminal Law seminar!
non-law-student: Why does it keep talking about actors?
2L: It doesn't mean film stars. It just means a person who acts.
non-law-student: Man, am I glad I'm not you.
Overheard by Criminellie
LLM Student: This class is like missionary. It's great your first time, then it gets old.
2L: Nah, it's more like anal. You keep thinking "Is he done yet? This hurts."
Overheard by RRS
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Monday, March 26, 2007
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Friday, March 23, 2007
Monday, March 19, 2007
Friday, March 09, 2007
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007
Overheard by JS
Overheard by DE
Evidence professor: "You really have no idea how stupid criminal defendants are. Imagine the stupidest person you went to high school with. Now, imagine a person that your stupid high school buddy would consider stupid. That’s your criminal defendant."
Overheard by KW
Friday, March 02, 2007
3L #2: What state's bar are you going to take?
3L #1: *shrug*
3L #2: Well, it'll between $2000-$3000, depending on state.
3L #1: (maniacal laughter)
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Evidence Prof: When Lebron James makes a three at the end of a game is it a statement? He's not actually saying anything. Actually, often when i go to games there is a woman with downs syndrome who sits behind me. She's a lovely woman, she thinks the players are talking to her.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Friday, February 23, 2007
Overheard by RRS
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Overheard by SE
Female 2L: Implanted
Evidence Prof: Implanted, okay. I had one student who was talking about when the IUD was "installed" and another one said that the IUD was "deployed". Do you think it was a man or a woman who wrote these? Installed, i gotta go down to Sears and get this IUD installed...
Monday, February 19, 2007
Con Law Prof: "Old people, when they vote, it's a scary thing."
Overheard by Without Reason
Discussing a case regarding a 6-year-old child who was sexually perped on twice in a trailer park by adult men while a friend of the child's mother watched.
Evidence Prof: "You know, if this case teaches me one thing it is to not raise my kids in a trailer park. That seems like that may be a bad place to raise children."
Overheard by a LawBitch
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Pretrial Practice Prof: Well, it's possible. But at some point during discovery, you're likely to interview or depose the wife. If two people come in wearing wedding rings and say they're married, you're likely to believe them. If you have doubts, you can always ask for a copy of the marriage certificate.
3L: Oh, okay.
PPP: Well, unless you're in litigation with Anna Nicole Smith. Then get everything in writing.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
3L: Wait, how can you get loss of consortium for the spouse when the employee's not injured, just out of a job?
2L: Maybe emotional distress leads to ED...which leads to loss of consortium?
3L: ED causing ED. I like it.
2L: Better than ED causing VD.
Saturday, February 03, 2007
Woman: When I was in elementary school, I brought my father's bong to school for show and tell. It was glass, and pretty, and had butterflies swirling all around it. I thought it was beautiful, so I brought it in and said I didn't know what it was. I was very confused when they sent me to the office and called my parents to come fetch it and me.
3L: Wait, the school administration let your father take his bong back?
Man: Sure, they're perfectly legal for smoking tobacco. You're a law student and you don't know this?
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
3L #2: Oh yeah. It's gory like Torts. People are always getting mauled by bears and stuff.
3L #1: Um?
3L #2: Wait. Probably not, since bears aren't products. ...but mechanical bears are.
Overheard by Friend of Dorothy
2L #1: well, you expect people can see your feet - and that some sounds might be heard...
Prof: What if there are two sets of legs in there? What should the officer do?
2L #2: Knock and annouce?
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Monday, January 29, 2007
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Student #1: if you've got nothing to hide then who cares. Leave the windows wide open, save money on air conditioning.
Student #2: You can still have things to hide that aren't illegal.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
3L #2: The class is held in a regular lecture hall for a 100 people or so, but all of us sit in the back of the class
3L #3: Why do you all sit in the back? Are you afraid that he is going to see you?
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Employment Prof: So tell us about Mers. What happened to him?
2L: He was working as a traveling representative for Dispatch. And then he got into a little bit of legal trouble: rape, kidnapping, and gross sexual imposition.
Prof: Right. Just a little bit.
Monday, January 22, 2007
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Straight Male 3L: The largest Sauna? or the largest sauna full of gay men?
Gay 3L: Both.
Straight Female 3L: Oh yea. I think my dad inspected their plumbing................Oh, in a nonsexual way!!!!
Thursday, January 18, 2007
3L female #1: Yeah, that's how I feel in mine, too... It's like 'Hey boobs, go back where you belong!'
2L female #2 looks up from her reading, distracted.
2L female #2: Boobs?
3L female #2: Guys, quit it with the boob talk, lesbian at the table trying to read. Have some consideration!
Female 1L Raises hand
Professor: Okay. Imagine that your daughter reaches 15 and becomes incredibly sexually charged and curious and begins experimenting.
Female 1L: Oh, you knew her?
Overheard by SB
3L on Winter Break: "...actually, I'm in my third year of law schoolat [name of school]."
3L's old friend from high school: "Really? That's interesting; I've often considered law school for myself... because I'm a Sagitarius."Overheard by TI
3L#1: I'm afraid this class is going to be too touchy-feely.
3L#2: I love touchy-feely! I'm going to hug everybody before each class and give them a chocolate covered Midol!
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Monday, January 15, 2007
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Female Attorney #1 (discussing events the Association hosts): The Judicial Luncheon is amazing. It's almost as if Judges are human.
Female Attorney #2 (discussing maternity leave): You can't go asking your boss what to do. They'll say "Drop the baby and get back on the blackberry!"
It's just a guy mentality: "What'll you need? one day? two?"
Overheard by Jaime
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Female 2L: That's right, it doesn't. Bring your condoms.
Male 2L: If I still have those condoms in a year, it would be really sad.
Female 2L: Umm, yeah...bring the condoms.