Yeah, we're close.

3L: He called me a bitch. Only my mom calls me a bitch.

I got shot in the butt-tocks

Mock voir dire
Crim prof #1: Where'd you get shot, sir?
Crim prof #2: In the butt! It's a recent thing! People shoot the victim in the butt!

Nothing to Hide

Crim Pro Prof: What if Dean X went and decided to open and check your locker?
Student: That's fine, i've never used my locker.

You would know...

Professor: (after long explanation of how to conceptualize a transaction) But that is probably not the law.

That's a new one.

Professor: What do you think, Mr. Student?

Student: I'm sorry, I wasn't uhhhhh...awake.

Professor: You weren't awake?!?! (stares in disbelief)

*Submitted by I'm Kind Of A Big Deal*

oh, the mistakes we make

International Trade Prof: "this may seem counter-intuitive, why would any country agree to something that would make it worse off? just like my 1st marriage, it happens."

Freedom of Speech

Guest Speaker: What are the rules for language in this class?
Professor: Go right ahead. You can say fuck all you want.

It's called senioritis

3L #1: I don't want to keep reading for school. I read most of the important chunk of one case, is that enough?
3L #2: I opened the damn book and I feel like I've done enough

Indeed, as they DO say

Property prof: "They're only on the land about 25 days a year and they get full possession? "WTF?" as they say!"

Overheard by SA

It didn't have to do with potatos and shamrocks?

Prof: Can you tell us about the conversion of Ireland?
3L: I dunno. Something about St. Patrick and a snake? I am not sure
what he did with the snake.

Overheard by JW

Aha! Big firms are for losers!

Tax Prof: I recently attended my old law school classmate's 60th birthday party. The Rolling Stones played. He wasn't a partner in a big law firm, he went into Private Equity. This has just been the most valuable learning experience you will have in my course.

Overheard by JS

Another reason why law school is like junior high school...

1L rep: Nominations will be accepted for Law School prom, but only serious ones please...

Gay 1L: Fuck that... I'm running for Queen Bitch!

Overheard by DE

I guess he disagrees.

1L #1: Civ Pro is exciting!
1L #2: I'm completely limp right now.

Overheard by MM

Hey, I know that guy!

Evidence professor: "You really have no idea how stupid criminal defendants are. Imagine the stupidest person you went to high school with. Now, imagine a person that your stupid high school buddy would consider stupid. That’s your criminal defendant."

Overheard by KW

can you demonstrate?

2L: So what do you do when your potential client is not being straight with you?

Prof: If you can't get at them frontally, get at them sideways.

Overheard by Bootstraps