Saturday, May 06, 2006

Lowest common denominator

2L #1: My second wind hasn't blown away yet.
2L #2: Do you need me to pull your finger or something?

Finals time is a special time

2L #1: I hit a woman in Minnesota.
2L #2: Did you mount her on the wall?
2L #1: No, just her baby.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Ahhh...Finals.

PR-studying 2L: "So i shouldn’t sleep with my clients?"
Oh-So-Very-Wise 3L: "No, no, no…you can sleep with them, you just need to start sleeping with them before you start representing them."
PR-studying 2L: "So I should just go around sleeping with people so I keep my options open?"

Nearby Prof, discussing his own experiences with PR: "I got an A in the class, which I thought might impair my job prospects. I mean, they want you to be ethical…but not that ethical"

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Jessica Fletcher Performs A Dramatic Reading of Medicare Part D

2L #1: How was Elder Law yesterday?

2L #2: Not too bad, thanks. One long policy exam. 2/3 of it was straight policy. Incredible.

#1: Yeouch.

#1: "Should we let seniors flounder in the ether? Yes or No?"

#2: "Matlock v. Andy Griffith? Who would win in this paradox?"

#1: I know! We'll get Family Guy to do an episode about it. TV is sure to give us the answer.

#2: When no one else can/will...

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Helltrain: Powered by Comedy

Offensive 2L: So I wonder which one of her relatives molested her.
2L: (Boisterous laughter)... Will you be conducting the train to Hell?
Offensive 2L: Yes. And you'll be shoveling your laughter into the engine the whole way down.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Sure Hunny

(Discussing Anna Nicole Ruling)

2L Girl: Who does she think she's fooling with those implants, they look so fake.

2L Guy: If you can touch them they're real.

2L Girl: I've felt fake breasts before and that is just erroneous.

2L Girl's Boyfriend: Please tell me you're referring to the shot girl who forced you to feel her up at the titty bar and not something else.

2L Girl: ...

Finals delirium, again

2L: Naked dancing makes me think of Justice Ginsburg.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Jack McCoy Taught Me Everything I Need to Know About the Law.

(During a study session for Criminal Procedure)

Prepared 2L: You never went to class, how do you know this stuff? Did you study before today?

2L Slacker: No, I just used to watched a lot of Law and Order and Law and Order SVU in undergrad while my friends and I would sit around and blaze. Jack McCoy is my hero.

Prepared 2L: I don't know if I should be annoyed or impressed.

2L Slacker: Impressed, I remember it even though I was blazed.

Right Track, Wrong Direction

After a gunner has opened her mouth and is wrong in her in answer

Professor: Well, you are sort of on the right track...

The Special Gunner: (Cutting the Professor Off) As Usual!!

Professor: But you missed [the major points]...

Monday Fun

1L#1: Hey does anybody know how the immigration boycott is going today?

1L#2: Well, I was able to get a burger at Burger King, so I haven't been affected.

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1L: I spilled water on my pants and it looks like my vagina is in the wrong place . . . Don't worry, guys, it isn't.

1L's BF: Stop talking.