I can't put my finger on that definition

2L boy: I guess I just have a conceptual problem calling Miranda a prophylactic rule, you know? I mean it seems to me Miranda really embodies the Fifth Amendment itself, rather than only protects one’s Fifth Amendment rights that are separate and distinct.

2L girl: Yeah, I know…I mean, why would the judges want to name it after something that they put up their butts? Did they not like it very much?

2L boy: what?

2L girl: You know, I mean that’s what a prophylactic is, right? Those things that people put up their butt?

2L boy: god I wish I was your boyfriend.


Overheard by Jaded J.D.

Pier 1 isn't working out

Copyright Prof: "If you do work for a large size entity like Viacom work is constantly coming in, if you work for a mid-size entity, you know like Kirsty Alley, you can have more breaks between projects."

Overheard by RR

unintended consequences

1L #1: We should compare briefs later...um, you know what I mean.
1L #2: Why do all my casual hookups turn into study groups?

Overheard by RB

Cream cheese is the great equalizer

3L: I'm just interviewing with [employer] because I need interview experience. I know that I'm better than that, and that I shouldn't be working for that kind of place.
3L#2, different school: .... YOU HAVE FOOD ON YOUR FACE.

I've never passed a Bar...

In the bookstore before the first week of classes.

1L: Well, I just really LOVE the law!
2L: Yeah, I used to, now i'm an alcoholic.

dead baby jokes?

Evidence Professor: Time for a new hypothetical, let's say i kill little mort. Little Mort is the creature who lives next door to me. He's three years old. I use him in my hypotheticals because he deserves to die.

Copyright Bounty

Copyright Prof: Acording to the RIAA we are all Pirates.
2L: ARGH!!!
Copyright Prof: Yes, ARGH! Unfortunately, we're not as sexy as Johnny Depp.

seat's taken

As 2L#1 walks into class looking for a seat...

2L#2: "2L#1, you can't sit here. you can't sit next to me. and actually, could you not sit in front of me either."

Hooray war crimes

Prominent International Law Professor: "I love war crimes tribunals. I collect tribunals like kids collect baseball cards."

So, Will Anything Be On The Final?

Legal Professions Prof: Anybody else want to pick a number from the board?

2L: 0

Legal Professions Prof: 0 is what I learned in Legal Ethics in law school . . . and I went here.

Oui...

Prof: Who in here feels like I'm speaking a foreign language?
Student from France raises hand.

Shotgun play?

Sports law professors talking about Maurice Clarett and how high school basketball players can go straight to the NBA but not NFL

Prof 1: maybe he should have practiced his shooting instead of his running.
Prof 2: i think he was in his last arrest...

At Least HE'S Telling The Truth!

Professor: A lot of law professors will tell you that there is no such thing as a bad question. (pause) Yeah, they're all full of shit.

If Elizabeth Cady Stanton played Bingo...

2Ls looking at classroom assignments
2L #1: where's our class?
2L #2: A64...i feel like i'm calling out bingo
2L #1: Binga...it's like if feminists played Bingo.

Common Sensical

Professor: We now have wireless in the classroom. You aren't allowed to use it to IM, check e-mail or search the internet. So you have access to it, but don't use it.

that's actually what brain tastes like

2L: I just burped out my nose and it tasted like potatoes.

The finer points of law school

2L: my tax prof could have amazing zoomers they may even be so bodacious that she could declare them dependants on her tax return.

somebody needs to do their shirt laundry

Legal Ethics Prof: Here's some good advice: don't walk into the bar exam smelling like marijuana. You should write that down.

Overheard by MM